This last weekend, during the post-Thanksgiving-gluttony-afterglow we, like many, start decorating for Christmas. I got out my nativity scene, my snow globes and other Christmas paraphernalia. I was dependent upon my husband to retrieve the Christmas tree from the depths of the garage or under the house or wherever the heck he stores it. Meanwhile, I had out all my lovely ornaments that I keep neatly stored in my "organized" ornament box. Then there's the other ornaments that won't fit into the ornament box, so I admit, I had them haphazardly stacked on my trunk in my family room thinking "well, they'll be fine here because before the day is done they will be carefully and beautifully placed on our pre-lit 8ft tall Kmart special Martha Stewart brand Christmas tree" (yes, I live among the pine trees and have a fake Christmas tree- don't judge. :0). But, this year we also had a storm for Thanksgiving and our driveway was like that of a bobsled course, slick and icy and my hard working hubby was working hard to clean it up along with other house maintenance stuff that needs to be done post storm and the Christmas tree never got put up. Later that day my husband went to grab something off the coat hook mirror that is directly above the before mentioned trunk and nearly knocked over my ornament pile. He said flatly, "What's up with the ornament "Jenga"?" We all laughed at the comparison.
Sometimes, as a mom or even as a woman, life can make you feel like a "Jenga" game. If you're not familiar, "Jenga"is a game of engineering really. It's a stack of wooden blocks into an approximate 16 inch tower and the goal is to take turns removing bricks from the tower, not from the top mind you, but from the middle, the bottom, the sides and all the while making sure the tower doesn't topple. If it falls while you're removing a wooden piece, you lose. I feel like this often. Like I'm the tower and I'm trying to stay erect while I let others remove my blocks. But ultimately, if I'm not letting Christ renew me and if I'm having the attitude that others are taking my time, my strength, my energy instead that I'm giving of myself to honor God and demonstrate love to others, then my tower wobbles and it sways until that one block is removed (otherwise known as the straw that broke the camels back) and I collapse. Perhaps emotionally by exploding at my kids or husband, maybe physically by getting sick or I get mad and pouty toward the loving Lord who wanted to sustain me all along, but I wouldn't let him. My focus and my faith is wrong. My eyes need to be ever fixed on the maker and sustainer of my soul and only then will I stand firm. Relying on my own strength leaves me weak and easily taken down. Please Lord, help me to remember I am not my own, I am yours. Renew my energy today to serve and love those around me.
Psalm 54:4 "Behold, God is my helper. The Lord is the one who sustains my soul."