You ever just "put something out there" emotionally or intellectually and are left hearing only the sound of crickets? If you're a responder/emoter/talker like myself then this kind of scenario leaves you feeling open, empty and vulnerable and wanting to retract your words ASAP. Then, of course, you're mind races through what the receivers are thinking about you and if you're a "tad crazy" and maybe you are...but if your emotional "guts" are laying out there, you hope that someone "gets" you, understands and maybe even relishes in your openness because we all need to be heard and validated, don't we? Not to say that everything we think, say or offer is valid but without that openness and honesty and sharing of ideas, where is the intimacy? How do we grow, get challenged and develop as people if we are not heard or hear others, for that matter. I pray that when I speak, I honor God in my words and that if I don't then those who love me well
will tell me so, because they "
get" me and
know me and
hear me and
understand that this will encourage me to live, think and speak better. And I pray that I will
listen and allow those around me to feel heard and understood.
1 Thessalonians 5:11
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing.
Well, you are not alone sister. You're "jenga" analogy actually brought tears to my eyes as I read it. I have felt that way for so long and although you believe you can't write, said so beautifully what I have been feeling and couldn't find the words for. I don't know if it is just the age we are at where we begin to examine the life we have knowing it may not be the one we thought we would have but never regretting a moment of what we have been lucky enough to find, or just old age and senility. I am so glad you are doing this blog and would love to take the journey with you. Keep writing......I'm reading. :-)
ReplyDeleteMichele