Monday, October 1, 2012
I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me.
Perspective is so relative, isn't it? Before marriage and kids, I thought I was busy. After my first child, I thought how ridiculous it was that I even believed I was "busy" before. And now, after three kids, I look back on all of it and laugh. I have to be careful to bite my tongue when someone, like me, views their life as I did and thinks..."how can it possibly get busier?"
But they'll figure it out soon enough, just like I did.
My walk with Jesus has been the same. I look back at journal entries from years back or even blog posts from two years ago and think to myself in comparison to the relationship I have with my Lord now, "Oh my gosh! I don't even KNOW if I was saved before!"
At least, I think I was... ha ha. The point is that it's changed. My relationship has grown deeper and the Lord is revealing more of HImself to me. I'm learning to listen to His voice more.... and yet, there is always more of Him to know. There is never a time when He will say, "Welp, that's all folks!" Never.
His sign will never read "sold out!"
On the flip side, I reflect on whether or not I am "sold out" for Him. Is there more of me that I need to offer to Him? Is there more of me that I have been holding back? Is there any part of me I keep for myself or for the world? When the world comes-a-knockin' can I say, "Sorry folks, there's none left because I'm already His." (I don't know why I suddenly speak in a southern dialect, but I'm thinking it's just gosh-darn sweeter.. hee hee) I know that I have and do hold back. That sometimes I straight up decide I'm going to do what I want to do.... and I fail. Frequently.
What I want to be is "Sold Out"....because we're all a slave to something whether we want to admit it or not.
I want to be a slave to Christ.
"a servant of Christ Jesus, called to be an apostle and set apart for the gospel of God-" Romans 1:1
"What then? Shall we sin because we are not under the law but under grace? By no means! Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness? But thanks be to God that, though you used to be slaves to sin, you have come to obey from your heart the pattern of teachingthat has now claimed your allegiance. You have been set free from sin and have become slaves to righteousness." - Romans 6:15-18