See the Tree

Matt 5:16
 In the same way, let your light shine before others, so that they may see your good works and give glory to your Father who is in heaven.

The old cliche' states "You can't see the forest for the trees". It's meaning describes a person who is so involved with the details that they can't see the broad picture. It's a great phrase in consideration of how we need to live and love as christians here on this earth. We need to be careful not to get so focused on the issues: political, social or otherwise because in a world that is lost, the details can be trivial and a distraction from what is important. Sharing the gospel and bringing others to Christ is the big picture.

I am not going to address the recent Chick-fil-A issue as it has and is already being over discussed all over the net.

I will say that I am a Bible believing Christian who is a sinner and who only has redemption because of Jesus Christ.

I will say that I believe the Bible in its entirety.

I will say that because of the grace of Christ in my life and because of what the Bible says I do not hate anyone. I do not support violence, hate or discrimination of any kind. I have no intentions of removing anyone's "rights" to the freedom our country offers. I have no intention of slandering anyone in opposition to my beliefs.

This is addressed to my brothers and sisters in Christ and this is about our testimony to the whole world.

Concerning the seeing the forest through the trees statement, can I make one argument?

SEE THE TREE.

In this world if we are so focused on our agenda, so focused on proving ourselves right and others wrong and trying to make the world as we believe it should be, we fail to see the people/the individuals in our lives who we are called to love and be a light to. You cannot grow a forest without planting the seeds one by one, THEN it is up to the work of the Holy Spirit to grow it. There are many things I cannot change and the Bible promises us that the world will only get worse until Christ's return. If we are hated because we love Christ, that is persecution. If we are hated because we hated first...that is a fail on our part.

We are not all called to be "Pauls" and to speak to multitudes. We are not Christ incarnate. We are not called to judge the world. We cannot hold others to a standard of living to soothe our uncomfortable feelings.

We are called to lovingly share the gospel.

To declare Christ's work in our lives and to testify the truth.

We cannot do that on the big scale unless we are doing it on a small scale first, every day offering grace, love and truth. If a heart is truly changed and filled with the Holy Spirit, the outer life will also change....It does not happen in reverse.

Christ did not die for our political freedoms. He died for you, for me and every face you see around you.

See the tree, because Jesus did...even amongst the crowd. He saw each person and knew what they needed....Him.









***There is a difference between judging the world and holding a christian brother/sister to accountability. (Matt 4)

Stealth Discipleship

Titus 2:3-8

 ...Older women likewise are to be reverent in behavior, not slanderers or slaves to much wine. They are to teach what is good, and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled. ...

I was asked recently, "why do young women not want to participate in women's ministries?" This is a question that I've seen come up on other blogs and in conversation, what seems like, numerous times in just this last year.  The trouble is that I don't think it can be simply answered. For me, I once lived under the misconception that women's ministries was "too pretty and tied up in a bow" for me. That I would never blend into the crowd of homemaking, made-from-scratch baking, gentle, quiet spirits that seemed to exist in such places. Though I grew up in the church and was "liked", I somehow often perceived that I was too goofy to be taken seriously. Some of my impressions, I acquired from comments made or looks received. So, why would I want to attend events or social gatherings that left me feeling like I was merely a shallow pool or that my value was less than perfect.

I'm going to tell you about three ladies who impacted me greatly and subsequently changed my views of women's ministry. I'm going to reveal the ways in which they discipled me without agenda, without an event and without direction from anyone but God's leading.

The first one is a gal named Mary Lou who happened to be employed at the same place as I, way back in 1993 when I first moved to So Cal. I was working as an aid in a 3/4yr old pre-school class and she was the pre-school/day camp receptionist. It was one day "out of the blue" when she invited me over to lunch at her house. I was new to the town and trying to find how I fit in among the throng of Christian College Students that lived in and all around that area while I attended the local JC in pursuit of nursing school. I remember feeling surprised that she wanted to spend time with me! I mean, she didn't even know me and I'm sure she had a ton of other enjoyable people she could have spent her time with but she asked me...and I was touched. We ended up spending several lunch hours together over the next several months and we talked about relationships and our faith. In her season of being newly married she encouraged me in my singleness to not settle, to not give up hope for a fantastic guy and that sometimes, that guy wasn't the most up front and obvious person. She loved me and without me even knowing it, she discipled me.

The second gal is Deb. The timing in which we became acquainted was approximately 5 months later after I had returned from working a summer at a camp in Washington State and Mary Lou had moved away and onto her next season of mothering her new baby girl and adjusting to life in a new state. Deb and I ended up working on the college staff at our church. She and her husband had just had their first baby. She and I, on one particular day, were talking about weight and exercise, or something girly and vain like that, when she asked, "out of the blue" if I wanted to come over for a walk. Again, I was excited this great woman wanted to spend time with me! I figured I'd enjoy it while it lasted and anticipated I would wear out my welcome soon enough, but that wasn't the case. We spent many a day walking, hanging out at her house, going to coffee, working on college staff and developed a friendship that meant the world to me. She demonstrated how she loved her husband, how she loved and parented her daughter and how she loved the Lord. It was she who, when I had made some bad choices was first in line to gently put up the mirror and show me what I was doing and lovingly encouraged and prayed for me as I wept through some of the most painful times during those years. She showed me grace and mentored me, without any program.

The last gal I'd like to tell you about is Rochelle. She and I met right after I had moved to Pollock Pines, before I found out I was pregnant with child number 2 (Jack was 8 months old) and while I had visited the local church's MOPS group. We said polite hellos and realized we had lived in the same city for a year or two while she went to christian college and I worked as an RN. We exchanged phone numbers and like many first introductions, that seemed to be it. Fast forward three months, I'm 3 months pregnant, mother of a 11 month old baby, in a city that seems so far from civilization (code: no Target or Starbucks for miles) and my husband was working 2 hours away. We'd just finished up our ministry and time at our old church and were seeking a local place to call home when "out of the blue" Rochelle called. I tell her I'm pregnant, she tells me she's pregnant and due 3 months before me (apparently she was pregnant when we met but her tall, slim figure did not reveal it in contrast to me who took a pregnancy test, my uterus fell into position, my stomach muscles all went lax and I immediately looked 4 months along..why does that happen?? I digress) She invited me to go somewhere...I have no idea where we spent our first day because it was the hundreds of days that followed where our relationship blossomed. She and her husband, had a dinner party inviting all the young couples from the church to "meet us", then had a BBQ after church so we could meet more people. It was she who would call when I was sitting, stranded in my house at 2, still in my PJ's and feeling lonely. It was she who show up to hang out and for some reason, I never felt bad about the conditions of my house and she made herself right at home and there was a certain comfort in that. She demonstrated true hospitality and friended me, without bows or perfection.

All this is to say that I believe that sometimes for young moms, our programs, events and studies, while truly good, are just "one more thing" for someone to sign up for and feel obligated to. That most days, your cup feels empty and trying to imagine one more commitment causes the sweats and palpitations. That in the midst of the baby puking, laundry washing, husband loving and the plethora of other things we already do...feeling pretty or tied up with a bow is the furthest thing from our beings. In fact, it's by God's grace if you make it out of the house without a snot trail on your clothes.

I don't know if you took note of the statements "out of the blue"...but please know, I used this term to represent what I perceived at the time. What I can now see in my present view is how God used these precious ladies to bring me exactly what I needed during those seasons of my life. They were his instruments and for that I am so thankful. What these three ladies did, that the women's ministry did not, was meet me where I was at and invest in me, without expectation of reciprocation. It was the phone call, the note (this was pre-text, people), the lunch/coffee date, the prayer, the empathetic tears, the laughter and the Lord's leading that were poured into me. I think there is room for both kinds of discipleship but we should be moved to pour into someone because Christ has poured himself out for us and His provision continues to fill us when we need it. Who do you know, even if only in passing, that needs to be pursued. If our Lord pursues me in relationship, how can I NOT do the same for others  in his name? Who can you overflow into so that your relationship can point them to Jesus and demonstrate a deeper relationship with him. This kind of discipleship is possible for the eldest of women. If you've got a voice, you've got an opportunity to encourage.

Be a part of your women's ministry, be active and involved because they're NOT all tied up with a bow and just maybe you can love on someone, mentor and be an example of Christ to them.

Isaiah 58:11 And the LORD shall guide thee continually, and satisfy thy soul in drought, and make fat thy bones: and thou shalt be like a watered garden, and like a spring of water, whose waters fail not.

PS. There were many other ladies that I could name who have encouraged and friended my in the name of the Lord but there is only so much room to write. I thank God for each one of you.

PSS. I'm linked up here with my new friend Denise!

A boxed delivery

Last night I arrived back home from the She Speaks conference. It was an amazing, inspiring and eye opening experience. I was able to hear from faithful and obedient women who were following their "calling" to teach scripture and encourage other sisters in Christ how to more effectively and genuinely share Jesus. During my time there I met some beautiful women who blessed my heart and friended me despite all my feelings of awkwardness. We were challenged to listen for God, to know him more and use the gifts given us to share Him and his truths with others on whatever platform God provides. To minister to my world of influence and trust God to do the rest.

One of the groups I participated in was a speaker evaluation group. My group leaders were Melissa Taylor and Stephanie Clayton. They were sweet, encouraging and gracious. Our mission was to share a 3 minute testimony on Friday and a 5 minute bible verse teaching on Saturday. They conceded right off that it's crazy to expect a 3 minute testimony and 5 minute teaching but it was a lesson in being concise and sharing your heart. I decided that attempting to reduce my life story (not that by worldly standards it's very exciting) to 3 minutes could only be accomplished if I shared a specific meaningful story or shared a theme.. I opted with the theme because it's more fun to make the abstract applicable and profound. I'm not sure that I accomplished either but I did cry, spoke everything I planned to say, said "um" at least a dozen times but I did finish within the 3 minute cut off.

Here is my 3 minute testimony:



A British playwright, Tom Stoppard, is quoted as saying "Life in a box is better than no life at all...".  

Life in a box is something I can relate to because, until I met Christ, that's exactly how I was living.  I grew up in a family that attended church together. My guides for living and our view of God was confined to a box. In all honesty, I loved it. I knew what was expected of me and had always been an "excellent rule follower". I had no plans to step out of these boundaries, mostly out of fear of failure and being the attention seeking people pleaser, this was a great way to live.

You see, box living has its benefits: you earn the trust of others, you receive praise and you avoid all the really bad consequences. Win, win, win. I was exactly what we want our kids to be. One time I lied to my parents and before they even suspected I came crying and confessed.  

But box living has its down side...

Growing up in a church, I must have heard the gospel at least 500 times but it was muted by the box I lived in and it failed to reach my sanctimonious heart.  I remember thinking "I don't think i sinned today". 

Outwardly, I don't think anyone questioned the destination of my soul. I was even highlighted in a yearbook article about my "faith" and involvement in church. 

 Phil 1:8 "But what does it matter? The important thing is that in every way, whether from false motives or true, Christ is preached. And because of this, I rejoice" 

Growing up in the church without revelation of the gospel is like performing a choreographed dance you've known your whole life. You know exactly what to do and how to look- kind of like a Stepford Christian, pretty on the outside but dead and hollow on the inside. You know, the lost outside the church are easy to spot, it's the lost inside the church that can be harder to find and reach. 

It was during my Senior year of high school when my eyes were opened to see that all my box living didn't earn me Gods attention or earn his favor. That was the day that the gospel penetrated. Thankfully, despite my walls of self righteousness and pride, Christ made a hole of truth. He revealed to me that, I too was a sinner that deserved death and required Christ's sacrifice.  My box living had blinded me from seeing my need for His grace . . 

Rom 3:10 “There is no one righteous, not even one;"  

I became aware that it was someone boxed like me who had yelled, "crucify him", it was someone like me who stood right next to truth, yet didn't recognize it. My box living was a delusion of protection that was destined to burn up in hell with me willingly inside.

Since then I get to follow him where he leads and pray He would use my old box and transform it into a billboard of truth that helps me point others to him. 

Mommy Dearest

Sometimes I think that if my children were to write a book about me right now, I would come across as Joan Crawford.

I openly admit that I have my "crazy" moments. Times when I am seemingly talking to myself, out of exasperation, because it feels as though no one else is listening. Times when I let my internal monologue out and say things I know I shouldn't. Times when I have LITERALLY heard the recorded version of myself in a rant when Jack was simultaneously playing with the web cam application on our computer. (Not a proud moment and true to crazy, I approached him afterward and said sweetly, "honey could you please erase that...oh, and I LOVE YOU!") ugh...

I overheard an interaction with some mutual friends recently where one friend was unhappy with the discipline choices of a babysitter and opted not to use her again. I think we could all agree, no one else could love or parent our children like we could. But I wholeheartedly also believe that if we are truly honest we could admit that we, ourselves, can often feel inept in our role as parents too. How many times in a moment of chaos with your child/children do you feel an absolute "????" and not know what to do? For me, it's more often than I'd like. It's in these moments when I allow myself to stop and pray and allow God's calm over myself that I usually respond better. But unfortunately, in the thick of it all, when I react- I fail. Now, I haven't beaten anyone with a wire hanger or cut their hair off while screaming, "Why can't you give me the respect I deserve???????!!!!???" But I have worn face cream and a bathrobe...which scares my children no matter what I am saying. :)

Parenting is not easy. It's not like you get a practice round or anything...they actually call that your first child. And maybe by the time you get around to your last, whether it be your second or twenty-second child, you're more relaxed and have learned a few tricks. But I think it can also be said that your LAST child sort of gets a more tired version of yourself. For my firstborn, I had the room ready three months early. I recorded all the details in his baby book. I was careful to read books, attend classes, watch birthing videos...yadda yadda yadda. By my third, I was like..."Hey, back in colonial days babies slept in empty drawers!"(I didn't do this) I was way less structured. In fact while potty training, though religiously consistent with my first, I was more like, "eh...as long as he gets it before high school."

I've had the crazy-can't-find-the-keys moments in the morning when we are, of course, running late to school and I've morphed into this frenzied maniac tossing coats and backpacks around in attempts to find them and then am shamed when I find them in the bathroom where I had left them only 15 minutes before. Honestly whenever I hear another mother share a "crazy" moment, I actually love her more and my soul "sighs" relief that I am not alone in my psychosis.

Thankfully, unlike Joan Crawford, I make every attempt to apologize and reconcile and learn from my mistakes. It's in these moments when I can teach my kids about humility, about forgiveness, taking responsibility for ourselves and God's amazing grace. To exemplify that, even I, am a work in progress but that I am pursuing to be teachable and moldable. I pray for God's work in my life to change me and bless me with patience, self control and wisdom to parent in a way that honors HIM.

Prayerfully my children won't require "too much" counseling when I'm done parenting them, but maybe by then...I will. Ha Ha.

Children's Ministry Matters

For our Children's Ministry at Pollock Pines Community Church. We are small but Mighty is the Lord. 

"Listen to our Hearts" written and performed by Geoff Moore and Stephen Curtis Chapman. 

PS. Don't enlarge the video, the quality doesn't translate well through blogger...or at least, I don't know how to post it well. :)