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Tuesday, July 5, 2011

Balloons

Life has been busy. Good busy. Tired and exhausting busy. Our ladies retreat was fantastic. Great fellowship, learning, laughing...all the good stuff I'd anticipated. I loved hearing from the other lady's and hearing how and what the Lord has been and is doing in their lives. I especially loved our pre-meeting prayer times together- so special. I felt blessed and privileged to be a part of it.

As far as my speaking time went, I can declare, "God is good." And although I had the whole thing written out, I could not regurgitate the experience for you with any clarity. I can say that I learned a lot about God's word, His plans and how much I need Him. The lady's laughed with/at me and we cried and afterward we hugged. You may ask, "why all the crying and hugging?"..well, we're girls. It's what we do amidst the giddiness of being together and we relish in the break away from the "real" world where we are responsible caretakers for the ones we love. 

Since then, I admit to feeling, sort of, "out of words". I can't describe it except to say I have been mentally and emotionally tired since then. There were 4 long months of build up to the retreat and it sort of feels like you are a balloon being blown up for a party. While getting ready you are being stretched, made full, ready for action and then all of a sudden you are let go and you whir about, make lots of funny noises and then there you are- left, deflated, stretched out and covered in spit. 

Much of it is my own fault. I apparently have issues with over scheduling myself. I figured that
a couple of short camping trips,
a ladies retreat,
a week of VBS,
a day at 6 flags
and a dance recital was a tame summer schedule for us. There was no week long vacation planned, no swim lessons..yet as I stagger from day to day...I realize my error. 

My husband's work has been slow and he's been working about 20-30% less, henceforth our income is reduced as well. So I've been picking up extra shifts, which we realize is a blessing that we have this option. But in between the scheduled activities, the work days, the commute, the coming up and down the hill (54 miles one way)... I find we have very little down or free time. 


It's all selfish and whiny, waaah.
I need to stop and take a breath. 
I need to take it one day at a time.


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